7 minutes in heaven

My SIL, Kathleen, had told me this video existed and I totally forgot about it until tonight. Chase is out at a Mav's game and I had a little time on my hands, so I looked it up.

Annnnnnnnd, now I'm officially excited for Eclipse to come out. Considering that I will be 84 months pregnant when Eclipse premiers I just haven't been able to get too hyped up about it. I'm having a hard time imagining myself standing in line at midnight wearing my "Emmett Prefers Enormo Pregnant Chicks" customized t-shirt.

However, this video has changed all that. Well, maybe not the part about the t-shirt, but the part about me being un-excited. Because I'm seriously excited now.

Still not excited about BDH as Victoria, though, because not only did they make her ugly, they gave the girl a FRO.

It's epic.

I'll say this for Eclipse. If it's better than New Moon on the same scale that New Moon was better than Twilight, I'll be a happy customer. Eclipse is my fave book of the whole series. Please pretty please let them not mess this up.

And now, for your viewing pleasure...

I almost started to write a whiner post.

But then I didn't. Because, you see, I'm reformed. Remember?

Besides, a fourth-round of pink eye is not that big of a deal to a two year-old. Two year-olds are NOTORIOUS for loving eye drops. LOVING. THEM. Yesterday, as I was applying them, I heard Sophie murmur something along the lines of "this reminds me of a spa treatment." Lucky girl, that Sophie!

And a three-week course of antibiotics for the same two year-old who STILL has double ear infections and sinusitis is still not that bad. Throbbing ear drums are, in fact, considered very attractive in some cultures.

And your four year-old having an asthma attack? Seriously! Who would complain about that? Oral steroids just make him bigger and stronger and crazier!

So, you know, we're just living the high-life over here. Life is just it's normal shade of RADICAL and I know you wish you were here to enjoy it with us.

See how awesome I am at not complaining? I'm like the KING of not complaining. Woot!

 

 

Okay, but seriously. Life's good. I got to eat sushi over the weekend and that usually ups the general level of kick-a-ness here at Chez Chi-town. And General Conference is coming up this weekend. And I heart Conference. Only partly because that means I'm making gooey, delicious Sister Mecham's Seminary Caramel Rolls. And there ain't nothing wrong with that.

Because I'm totally going to the gym this week.

As soon as everyone starts breathing normally.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So I'm totally going to the gym next week.

No friggin' way!

This is Kristen Bell. She's gorgeous, right? Great skin, cute dress, nice hair, blah to the blah.

I want to talk about her knees, because this picture is like a revelation for me.

Hi. My name is Anna, and I have horrible knees. They're really round and shapeless and they kind of ooze right into the top of my calves. They're worse right now because I haven't been to the gym much lately (but remember how I ate a granola bar last night? That's gotta be helping.). They're better  when I'm a lunge-a-holic and a squat queen. But they're never like the shapely, lovely knees of my sister-with-legs-like-a-colt, Lylla. I'm not sure where she plucked her knees from on the family tree, but mine came straight from my ever-loving mom. And heaven bless her, those knees carried 8 children so why should I complain?

Well, icky knees are a hard thing to conquer. Most people have knees with some relative definition. As in, you can tell that the thigh has come to a stop and that the calf will come soon thereafter. I  have none of that. Just ooze. And I've always been ashamed of it - especially since the inside of my knees round out toward each other. Ugh. It's just a big mess.

But, Kristin Bell! Look at her! She's gorgeous and she HAS MY KNEES! And you know what? They don't look so terribly bad after all. Yes, yes, she's 20 sizes smaller than me and not retaining water. But it gives me much hope to think that someone with MY KNEES can go running around with them sticking out like that. Glory hallelujah, I just want to stare at them all night!

So for now I'm stuck with the water retaining, baby supporting, tree trunk versions. But maybe in the future you'll run into me somewhere sunning my knees and you won't even recognize me because you'll be all, "Wow! Those are some great gams!"

I ate a granola bar and a glass of milk last night...

...in lieu of nachos and ice cream, which is what I've eaten every night for the last five (at least) nights.

So, I think I can safely say that, even though I've only been to the gym twice since Christmas Eve, I'm about even now, right?

Right?

(crickets)

But seriously. I thought I was pretty awesome for that one.

And I'll totally go to the gym on Friday.

I think.

Ode to Drugs

 

O, Drugs

How good you make me fill

When I am oh, so cranky

And sick and nasty,

fo rill.

You make my breathing passageways

so clear and so defined

I almost don't have a problem

getting cortisone in my behind.

You made my day much brighter

when once you met my system.

I wish I didn't have

to beg my doc to listen.

I thank you for your magic

may it never go away.

For you have made my world

on this dreary, pee-filled day.

**********************************

I swear, I have spent a lot of the last four months whining. Whining about the boys' asthma, whining about my morning sickness, whining about Sophie's triple back-to-back pink eye, and her ear infections and her sinus infections, and Miles' pink eye. Oh yeah, and my non-stop infections.

But this is my proclamation to the world: I am reformed. I promise to stop whining so dang much. I know that this is the crap that life is made of. It happens because we live in this place we call mortality. And I can be healthy when I'm dead. I mean, when I'm dead and living in heaven and my body is perfected and...oh crap. You know what I mean.

It does make you realize, though, once you're feeling good, that feeling badly really DOES make you FEEL BADLY. It's hard to feel GOOD when you feel BADLY. You know what I mean? And please don't get me wrong, I have watched enough close family and friends suffer through actual, life-threatening illnesses in the past few years (mostly I have watched them, watch their children go through it - which is even more heartbreaking). I know that a couple asthma attacks and some colds are NOTHING. I know that. I don't forget it, even on my worse day. But I think I do forget to be grateful when I'm feeling really well. Or when I'm just feeling not crappy, even.

So. I am reformed. No more whining. Okay, I'll probably whine occasionally. I'm thinking, maybe starting in the end of June, early July? Is everyone okay with that? Because I'll be looking like Shamu's older sister by then, and I think whining is okay? Yes?

Anyway, I thought I should just throw some things out here that have made me feel SO GOOD lately. Because I am a blessed woman, in so many ways.

1. Good friends. I am surrounded by women both local and far, who astound me. They are compassionate, willing to give of their time and talents, and are selfless. They are funny. They are willing to forgive my long absence from play-groups, ladies night out and various and sundry things. They don't expect too much from me, and make me feel welcome and loved every time I see them. It's amazing to feel that. So, thanks, girls.

2. Miles is learning his alphabet. Oh Miles. I've had my eye on you. I have silently (and not so silently, at times) had some concerns as I've watched you grow and develop. You're smart, curious, SO loving, creative and fun. But you're different from Cameron and, in my naiveté, I'll admit I may have compared. You haven't noticed, but I did it anyway. I'm so grateful to see you learning and growing at your own speed and pace. You do learn differently, and I'm getting used to accommodating it. But that's why we're partners, you and I.

After trying all the same teaching methods that worked with Cameron, I finally gave in and tried a VIDEO called The Letter Factory  by LeapFrog. And Miles, who couldn't identify a single letter except "O" and occasionally "F" is now grabbing letter magnets off the fridge and bringing them to me saying their name AND sound!!! I can't tell you how I beam and praise. It's probably over the top. But he likes to hear how awesome he is. So, naturally, I oblige.

3. Sophia is potty training. And while I kinda hate potty training, it's amazing to see your kids picking up new skills and (sniff) growing up. She is SO PROUD of her princess panties! I love seeing her clap her hands and shout "Ooray mommy! I do it!" and give me a big hug. We do some dancing, some high-fives and shout out our excitement for her. It's become a whole family thing. Cameron and Miles and Daddy get right in there and tell her how great she is. So, Sophie is amazing. (and she may have turned a corner, but I'm not going to jinx it by talking about it...just cross your fingers and your eyes and your legs that she keeps doing so awesome!)

4. Drugs. Did I mention drugs? Even if I have spent (hold onto your hats) about a grand on drugs just since November. I'm grateful to live in a time and place where I can get the healthcare my family needs.

5. Chase. I. Love. That. Man. He just makes everything easier and better. And I think his company's audit is almost over so we'll get to see him again soon. And hey, while we're at it, I'm so glad Chase isn't doing public accounting! Holy schmoly the things we've gotten done on Saturdays this month...

6. The Gospel. This list is getting long. I know. Sorry. It's your fault for reading this far. But having an understanding of my place in this world, and in the world to come, is such a peaceful thing. I can't quite describe it, but it's a feeling of being almost untouchable. I know that I have to endure trials and challenges in this life. And some are going to be so hard that I will have to fight with every ounce to get through them. But they're temporary. And, in the grand scheme of things, they will be for my benefit and make me stronger. All we take with us is what we learn on this earth, and then we go on to a better place to live and serve with our Heavenly Father. How amazing is that?

7. Spandex.

8. Ice cream.

9. I'm just making this long enough to end on an even number. And spandex was an actual item on the list. And who can stop at 7? Or 8? That makes for a very weird list, in my book. You gotta hit at least double digits or you're clearly an ungrateful witch.

10. Cheese. Seriously. What doesn't taste better with Cheese on it?

11. Super hero costumes. Okay, I know I implied I'd be done with 10, but now I want to see how far down you'll read. How much do you REALLY love me? Huh? HUH?

12. My garden. Yes. You heard that right. I have an honest-to-goodness garden growing in my backyard. So far I've got peas, beets and carrots in the ground with much more to come. Summer will be a happy place with that home-grown goodness to chow on. Yummmmm.

Okay, I'm done. Fo rill.

You HUGE!

Proof that I am an Ugly Mom:

Tonight as we were sitting (around Sophia's potty), about to read scriptures, I was letting Miles brush my hair. After combing it into a nice fluffy coiffure, Miles said, "Mommy,  you're HUUUUUUGE!" Then he came around front to get a nice, good look and repeated, "Mommy! You're huge!"

At which point Sophie, from her throne, giggled and said, "huge, huge, huge! hee hee hee!"

If only they weren't so right...

Shori Pony

We're having another girl! Well, this is what the doctor assures us because we got some GOOD looks and there wasn't much to see. But after Chrysta's experience I'm not counting my chickens until they've hatched. The good thing is that for a girl I don't really have to prepare anything. She'll share a room with Sophie and the paint/decor will all stay the same. If The Crazy happens and she turns out to be HE, Sophie will still share the room (for the time being, anyway), but we'd have to paint and choose more neutral bedding for both Sophie and the crib.

So. There you go. Baby #4 will be a girl! Yay! We're thrilled to get things evened out around here! And she will get to grow up with my SIL  Kathleen's little girl who will make her debut about a week or two before her. Fun!

BTW: We'll be naming her Shori Pony. We figure since we don't live in Utah anymore we should bring the experience of combining your parents names to create new and unique (read: Sucktastic) names, to Texas. So Sherry + Tori = Shori and Tony + Pat = Pony. Duh. Chase would like me to point out that Terry Tatrick also would have worked.

Eclipse Trailer: Why does it suck so much?

Am I the only one who thinks this trailer is...lame? The other trailers were much better. I'm holding out to see what new trailers come out over the next couple of months. They've GOT to get better.

My reaction to every other Twilight series trailer has involved some sort of screaming. My reaction to this one?

"Uh, okay."

And are they kidding with Victoria? Guys, it's Bryce Dallas Howard. And you made her look UGLY. Do you know how hard you have to work to make Bryce Dallas Howard look ugly? Badly done, Summit. Badly done. (totally just watched Emma the other day)

And yet I have great faith that the movie itself is going to be great. June 30, woot woot!

All night long

That's the Lionel Richie song that's in my head at the moment.

Because I was up, you know, ALL NIGHT LONG.

Miles just didn't feel good, and as I was scrubbing puke out of the carpet at 3:30 am I was providing solace for myself, thinking that since he'd been up all night and sick, he would most assuredly be somewhat lethargic today. And I would have appreciated that. My sinuses have been attacking me for three weeks straight and I'm approximately the size of Shamu.

See that open mouth? That's how I've been sleeping lately.

Anyway, Miles - being Miles - has done little to relieve me today.

Instead he's been bright, bouncy and full of life! Oh hooray! And yes, I know that technically this should make me happy. "My little boy isn't suffering and in pain!" And hey, that's nice. But guess who IS suffering and in pain?

Right. Me.

Annnnnnnnd, he has an equally spunky, busy little accomplice.

Don't you wish YOU looked like this with pink eye, double ear infections and a sinus infection?

Question for the universe: Where do children get their energy? Heaven knows it's not from eating. There's very little eating going on here. And I can't even imagine it's photosynthesis, since the sun hasn't been showing it's face around here lately (except when I'm so sick that leaving the house isn't optional - like today).

SO? Where?! How? And most importantly, WHY?!